You know…. in life there’s those moments when you’re just smacked in the face with something unexpected. I try to always mentally and emotionally prepare myself for the worst possible things to happen, but obviously it’s impossible to expect everything. One specific thing that is probably very impossible to dodge is heart break.
You know that amazing feeling of being in a relationship and thinking that everything is perfect and going to last forever? Well… news flash. It’s probably not going to last forever, especially when you’re young. I thought Peach Girl was a good example for situations such as this. To keep it brief, Momo is the main character, a girl who’s in love with this boy. Eventually she finds herself in a lot of traumatizing situations and in a love triangle. I don’t feel like droning on about the plot of this anime/manga today, so if you aren’t familiar with it, then I apologize. For more insight of what I mean, think of Charles Darnay and Lucie Manette; their love was full of obstacles and never easy. It’s never easy, no matter who you are.
Now, back to where I started. I’m the type of person that tries to avoid conflict and getting hurt as much as possible. I do this for a few reasons. First off, getting hurt never feels good… obviously. And if I can get hurt as little as able, that’d be pretty great. Secondly, I know how I react to things. I’m the type of person that takes everything to heart. If something goes wrong, then I blame it on myself all the time. Things are always my fault in my mind, so the less that goes wrong, the less I beat myself up about things. Now, like I said previously, I can’t always be prepared for things– sometimes things happen unexpectedly. For example: break ups. After a break up, I try to play it cool as I can. Obviously, things didn’t work out for a reason, so there’s no point in dwelling upon anything, plus there’s plenty of fish in the sea, but I’m not a fish, and the ocean is scary. While I might seem like I was able to handle things well, it’s the total opposite. I end up with the mentality of wondering what I did wrong or what could I have done to make things better or even just what can’t I personally be someone more want-able. I can think about all these things and cry for hours, but what’s the point? Life keeps going and if I sit wishing things were different, then I end up missing opportunities. I need to be able to take time to recover vs dwelling and hating myself over things that were out of my control. In TOTC Sydney Carton sucked up everything and embraced the fact that he was at least in the life of the woman that he loved. I don’t know he he does it… it’s so hard.
I guess I’ll stop with my rant about myself now. I can’t even stay on the topic of Peach Girl.